4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Please, let me fuck your mom
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
