What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
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Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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