I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
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