Where is the hickey?
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.