I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
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