we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
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