I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
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