Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
True but thats because hes a fetus.
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
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