Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
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