is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
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