After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
