hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
I need a beard to bite.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
