I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
Randomize
