i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
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