I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
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