tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
She even gives head with a lisp.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
Randomize
