I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
Randomize
