I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
