i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize