i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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