I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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