How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
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