I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
it's too hot outside to masturbate.
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Couch. On fire.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
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