We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
Randomize
