whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
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