quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
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