he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Randomize
