new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize
