How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
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