So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
Randomize
