i wish there were pregnant emoticons
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
