I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
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