Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
Randomize