so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
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