I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Randomize
