whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
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