Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
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