she asked me if the dress made her look fat, i told her no - the fat made her look fat.
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Randomize
