I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Randomize