in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
its not stalking. its research.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
