Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
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