i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
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