Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Randomize
