when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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