Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
Randomize
