Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
