ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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