People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
Randomize
