three words: i give head
three words: not that well
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
I deserve to be covered in dicks
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
