there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
i think i have two assholes
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize