I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Randomize
