They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
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I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
Boobs are out for the taking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
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